Magic Hat

Hocus Pocus. Circus Boy. #9. Summer Mystery. What do these all have in common? If you actually read labels before you gulp them down, then you would probably recognize these as the four beers found in Magic Hat Brewery's Summer Variety Pack. The next question is then, can you identify the differences? What distinguishes on from the other? Are any of them actually worth consuming?

I had the privilege of visiting the Magic Hat Brewery this summer, located in a corner of South Burlington, Vermont. The building looks like a factory that has been raided by overzealous art students, and the inside feels like some real-life version of the Nightmare Before Christmas. If you can make your way through all of the merchandise, including backpacks, playing cards, and condoms, you'll find the beer sampling station. It is here that Magic Hat tests its new creations, and I was pleasantly surprised with several of these unusual brews. My personal favorite was an experimental beer with coriander and orange peels, which has a taste approaching that of a good tea. Sadly, it is doubtful that this beer will ever be circulated, but I still figured that the Summer Variety pack was worth a shot.

I will go from lightest to darkest beers, and start with the seasonal Hocus Pocus. Magic Hat advertises it as “equal parts delirium and divine intervention.” Sadly, this description has nothing to do with either taste, appearance, or quality of the beer. Yhe Hocus Pocus beer is actually a typical American Pale Wheat Ale. Made with pale and wheat malts, this beer has moderate bitterness, and only a slight taste of fruit. I find this beer unsatisfying at best, and a waste of time at worst.

Next up, and only slightly more satisfying is the Circus Boy beer, available year round. Yet another American Pale Wheat Ale, the big difference is that this one is left unfiltered, giving it a slightly cloudier appearance. It tastes, again, moderately bitter with small traces of flavor, this beer is ultimately flat and unsatisfying. If you've had either of these beers before, you've probably forgotten, and for good reason. Both these beers clock in between 4.5% and 5.4% alcohol by volume (ABV), putting them on par with the multitude of forgettable beers that lack flavor and craftsmanship.

Next up is the #9 beer. Advertised as a beer whose “mysterious and unusual palate will swirl across your tongue and ask more questions than it answers.” And what's up with the name? Magic Hat Brewers respond with “Why #9? Why indeed.” Returning to reality, #9 does taste unusual, with a difficult to define fruitiness. And this makes sense, being that it is a Fruit Beer, where fruits are added to overpower the bitterness or hoppiness that would otherwise dominate beers like this. Apricot is the dominant fruit, with traces of other, less easily defined fruits as well. This beer is much more satisfying than the American Pale Wheat Ales, but is ultimately too weird for its own good.

The final beer included in the Variety Pack is the Summer Mystery Beer. Significantly darker than the others, with flavors that linger in the mouth, this beer is almost worth the fancy labeling and overly creating advertising that Magic Hat packages it in. Classified as an American IPA, it has resounding citric and herbal flavors, complimented by a malt base. And clocking in at 7.5% ABV, the Magic Hat Brewers have stumbled upon something that is original, and almost worth drinking.

So overall, the Magic Hat Summer Variety Pack was nice, but disappointing. There are so many other good beers out there, some of them brewed by Magic Hat, that I almost felt cheated. As for their confusing and meaningless descriptions of their beers, I feel like the only people who can truly appreciate their meaning are those who came up with them in the first place.

Next week: Hophead Heaven.